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Victorian Life

from Comedy by Dan Rosen

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It was always Charles Dickens' intention to have Tiny Tim, Oliver Twist, and Pip form a Hip Hop group. This is their debut single.


Cause my name’s Tim But don’t you dare call me tiny/ When I pull down me trousers All the ladies be like “blimey!”/ Yeah I’m crippled, mothafucka almost everyone knows this/ Stricken from birth with renal tubular acidosis/ Though my legs may be shriveled but where it matters I’m huge/ If pussy was money I’d be Ebenezer Scrooge/ I’m the ghost of pimpin past and present still number one/ Then last night I showed your girl the ghost of things yet to come/ Yeah I got so much street cred that noone can match it/ I rob you suckas blind Count your money like Bob Cratchit/ But you know I’m just playing, y’all Just having some fun/
To all you artful dodgaz God bless us everyone!

Victorian life
Bust out your quills and take some dictation
Victorian life
There’s sewage in the streets got no public sanitation
Victorian life
We come from such hard times we can't practice moderation
Victorian life
The artful dodgaz gonna cause a sensation

I wanna hear all of you holla it’s Oliver twist/ You wanna hear my story I’ll give you the gist/ Straight down on my luck until I met my jew, fagin/ Showed me an unorthodox way to bring home the bacon/ Now I gots to pick a pocket or two or three/ You thought you had some rhymes now they all belong to me/ I’m a full grown man, you’re all a bunch of tykes/ You try to step to me I fuck you up like bill sykes/ Now I’m here to tell y’all Yo you trickses and hoeses/ Come over to my crib and I will buy your sweet red roses/ Now c’mon all you bitches get on the dance floor/ I’ll get all the ladies screaming “Twist, can I have some more?”

Victorian life
Living to close to our neighbors
Victorian life
We’re doin child labors
Victorian life
Work so hard to make every doller-ah
Victorian life
And everyone’s got cholera

Listen up it’s P-I-P, and you may think you don’t know me/ Probably skimmed my life story, now you tossers can blow me/ Straight from the marshes of kent my future couldn’t be blacker/ Till I got hooked up by my mysterious benefactor/ Now I got that money and jewels and the ladies I ravish ‘em/ Take a look at me now, Estella and miss havisham/ I got so much money I can pick up any chick and/ Bring them home choose which one I’ll stick my charles dick in/ But some of the ladies better start having abortions/ Or we’re gonna have a crisis of Malthusian proportions/ This goes out to the women from all the world’s nations/ If they hear that PIP’s coming they got some great expectations

Now all my orphans in the house throw your hands up
If you got no moms or dads throw those hands up
If you’re real old school throw your hands up
If you hate cold gruel throw your hands up


from Comedy, track released July 1, 2009
All music and lyrics by Dan Rosen

Tiny Tim: Dan Rosen
Oliver Twist: Annie "Fatty" Masters
Pip: Alex Dunbar


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Dan Rosen New York

Producer of beats, soundtracks, and fake rap.

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